Satire from The Borowitz Report: “Trump to Skip 2024 Campaign and Go Straight to Claiming He Won”

PALM BEACH (The Borowitz Report)—Donald J. Trump will skip the 2024 campaign and go straight to claiming that he won, the former reality-show host has confirmed.

Speaking to reporters, Trump said that campaigning in 2024 would be “a waste of time, quite frankly, because I have already won that election.”

Asked how he could have won an election that is not scheduled to occur for another three years, he said, “People are saying that it already did happen. A lot of very smart people are calling me and saying that.”

As we all know, humor needs to be rooted in truth.  And, when we think about it, Trump has already shown that the actual vote count is immaterial to how he sees the election outcome.

He was in Iowa the other day with the same old lies, rattling on and on.  Video of some of his fans indicate that they’re tiring of all this, and would like to hear something new.